As we enter the holidays fraught with coming and goings, hither and yonders and all sorts of busy-ness, please remember to be kind to yourself. I realize that is easier said than done, and to be honest I absolutely am terrible at being kind to myself. I didn’t even realize it until my husband brought it up to me one day. My self-talk definitely needs work. Needless to say, I am a work in progress more than a teacher on this subject.
Even with my less than proficient ability to be kind to myself, I do want to share with you some truths I have learned over the years about the subject. It starts with remembering the kindness of the Lord. I love these two scriptures that speak about His kindness:
The LORD is kind and merciful, patient and full of love. Psalms 145:8
The Lord is kind and merciful, slow to anger and rich in compassion. Psalm 103:8
Gosh those verses make me feel warm and fuzzy. I love these attributes of our God- kind, merciful, patient, full of love, compassionate. So how do I treat myself the way God treats me? That might sound like a weird question to some, but if you have struggled with low self-esteem, you totally get it. I’m sharing these truths for those of us that have spent too much time on the “I hate myself” bus.
Here are the 3 truths to help you be kind to yourself:
- God delights in you. What a foreign concept to a brain that has been wired to see every flaw, every failure and mistake rather than notice the good things about ourselves. It’s really about realizing we have been conditioned to see ourselves in this unhealthy way. Why is that? We live in a world that is steeped in valuing outward beauty, strength and intellect. Unless we intentionally get to know God, then this world view drives our values. We have to realize that God delights in us. Like for real. It’s like the same way that I felt while I watched my 2-year-old grandson playing on Thanksgiving. He loves music and sings nonstop. He carries drumsticks around with him everywhere he goes, to which he refers to as “sups” (we have no idea where he got that name) and drums on couches, floors, tables etc. to his favorite songs. It is literally the cutest thing I have ever seen in my life. I delight in watching him dance around and sing. That’s exactly the way God sees us. He isn’t waiting for us to mess up so he can slap us around a bit. No, he’s a doting father that thinks we are the cutest thing! That makes it easier to be kind to ourselves, right?
- You are a work in progress. When your child is learning a new skill and messes up, do you scream and berate them for their inability to do something perfectly the first time? Well, of course not, unless you are just a jerk and need to get counseling. No, you hug them and re-assure them that you love them and help them learn from their mistakes. You understand that they are growing and maturing. They are going to make mistakes, so you have grace. Oh yes, grace….something God is full of for us so we have to learn how to give ourselves grace as well.
- You don’t have to be perfect to be loved. Somewhere along the way, I believed lies that I needed to be perfect to be loved by God, family, my husband, friends….well everyone, I guess. I didn’t just think I needed to be perfect, I thought I needed to be special. It was exhausting every day to try and be perfectly special. It was like walking on a tight rope while juggling balls and spinning a plate on my head. Who in the world can do something like that? NO ONE! And that’s the big take way here, NO ONE IS PERFECT, well except for Jesus of course. I believe we try to be perfect because we think it will make people love us. But we need to remember that the very people we are attempting to solicit love from are just as imperfect as we are. It’s ridiculous, right? Here’s the deal, God loves you, Jesus died for you and the Holy Spirit is with you. They love you. They are crazy about you and all of your silly imperfections. Just accept it!
I hope you take these truths to heart and bask in them a bit as you head into the holidays! Please leave me a comment or share this post if it spoke to you!
